Motivation I Found You

About a year and half ago I was running in a 5k when I felt a pain in my knee I had never felt before. At the time I was about 2 miles in so at least I was closer than not to the finish line but at that moment it really felt a long way. I powered through the pain walking letting it subside, some what, then pick up running and it would hurt worse. What seemed liked an eternity I finally crossed the finish line, and limped my way to the vehicle. When I got home and couldn’t even change out of my clothes without crying out in pain I was for sure I had torn something in my knee. But being a little stubborn I waited until Monday to go in to the walk-in Orthopedic and see what I’d have to do. Fearing the absolute worst I was surprised I had not torn a thing but I had flared up my IT Band in my knee. I was also told that it was something that could go away eventually, might come back one day or might continue to have some pain. Thankfully the pain went away but after that I was a little timid to jump back into running so I started slacking at it. 

Cardio had been something I’d been doing for years when all of a sudden I had the fear of the pain coming back holding me back. My strength training increased but my motivation to run had some what disappeared. 

Recently I told myself I really need to start training again for I want to do the Go Far Challenge again at the Fargo Marathon and run the 5k and the 10k. But for some reason I lacked the motivation I once had, that was until recently.

Last week I went into my gym, Anytime Fitness, and found myself getting one of their new heart rate monitors. Who knew such a little object could be the exact motivation I needed! First off I had a little fun with the staff at the 45th Street Anytime Fitness location figuring out my nickname…hey if you’re going to do it might as well have some fun so in the end it was decided and so you know, when you see “Big Pimpin Zee” up on the screen at the gym, that’s me! 

However, I digress, back to the point, so Thursday after I got it I went into the gym for the first time in a long time to just get on the treadmill. You see the treadmill and I have a long history of not always getting along so I’ll often use it for a bit then jump on the elliptical or AMT machine to finish my cardio but surprisingly not this time. 

I talked with the manager in the South Moorhead location who excitedly told me I’d be blown away with how much it will get me to push myself. You see the idea is you see where your heart rate is during your workout and try to reach the percentage of where the color on the TV screen in front of you is orange. My plan was run ten minutes and then move onto the next thing. Imagine my surprise when I looked up and realized I was already a half hour in! Even before my IT Band flared up I barely was on the treadmill. I had never been that excited about what I had done on the treadmill in my life. Not only that after my workout was completed an email was sent to give me a summary of my workout, how many calories I had burned and it gave me points. 

This new little heart rate monitor is a workout game changer for me and I don’t say that lightly at all. It has inspired me to get in three runs already since I got it last Wednesday and I’m already planning my next workout with it for tomorrow. 

Finding that inspiration, finding that motivation for anything in life is so important and sometimes it comes at just the right moment. The heart rate monitor for me could not have come at a more perfect moment. My gym always surprises me and continuously find ways that inspire me and keeps me going. They are my gym family and I love them for helping to always keep me going no matter what! 

If you feel you’re in a slump of any kind and in any aspect of your life, it might be time to ask those around you for that little push. You might find that sometimes it’s the little things, like the heart rate monitor, that will give you the drive once again to go after your goals. 

This is the year to believe, to believe anything can happen. Make it your year I know it’s my plan to make it mine, now go out there…make it happen and believe! I know “Big Pimpin Zee” believes ūüėČ

Life Adventures…Here I Come

I’ve started this post over and over many times looking for the correct words on this one but then I looked at a list on my phone and realized that the list itself is exactly what I need to share first before I find the right words, so with one realllllly deep breath, here I go.

Bucket List: Life Adventures that I want to experience.

  • Visit Australia
  • Visit New Zealand
  • Visit Ireland
  • Visit Italy
  • Visit Spain
  • Visit all 50 States
  • Hold a Koala
  • See a Panda
  • Go to a Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade
  • Experience a concert at Red Rock
  • Experience a concert at the Grand Ole Opry (accomplished 10-22-16)
  • Have a six pack abs once in my life
  • Own a house
  • Make Wine
  • Learn to Play Guitar
  • Try out for a music TV competition
  • Own a lake home
  • Visit an area where there are open window ceilings to watch and sleep under the Aurora Borealis
  • Stargaze from the back of a truck bed with the back filled with pillows, cushions and blankets
  • Sturgis (accomplished August 2014)
  • Get the word BELIEVE tattoed on my foot
  • Act in a Fargo play
  • Sing the National Anthem at a Vikings and/or Twins game
  • Get married
  • Have a family
  • Start a wine group

Writing this and knowing that even one person could read this list made me nervous,  not going to lie my heart was pounding and is still pounding after typing out this very personal list, but I needed to do it, because I feel it makes me more accountable then I have ever been. It makes it more real, that these are things I truly do want to experience and hope one day I am able to check off. Some more than others as I wrote them down in no particular order.

But why am I sharing the list? That’s a good question. To prove to myself I have the courage to start making them happen. You see I’ve had this list for a few years on my phone and every now and again I look at it and think “I still want this to happen or maybe this will happen this year” and then it seems time passes and another year comes and I’m still looking at a list that hasn’t happened. For example; learn to play guitar has been something I’ve thought about for as long as I can remember now but why haven’t I gone after it and just done it? Fear. Fear I wouldn’t be very good or worse yet, wouldn’t be able to do it. What a silly thought.

Fear holds many of us back from so many things and if 2016 did teach me anything it’s to begin conquering my fears. Maybe I won’t be the best guitar player in the world but at least if I try I can say just that, I tried it no matter what. Failure happens to the best of us but if we don’t at least try we won’t ever know if we can and that’s the saddest part of it all.

Don’t let your fears hold you back from what you want to do and if you fail at something don’t think it’s over, just get back up and try it again. You think electricity was invented over night? It certainly wasn’t, which should be encouragement enough to want to try, try again. I realize that not everything on this list is as “simple” as going to try and learn to play guitar. Some of them come with time and patience but as well as opening myself up to different possibilities and not turning away from something that might scare me. I have a tendency of thinking about things too much and questioning them too much, but maybe, just maybe by sharing this I’ll begin to act and not over think it all.
With all of that said, I now encourage you to write down your Bucket List: Life Adventures that I want to experience and see what you come up. Then comes the hard part, share that list with someone, I know that seems a little silly but it’s scarier than I thought but in doing so I bet it will spark something inside of you that will give you the courage to go after what you want. In one year from now I plan on seeing what I checked off this list and I’m feeling more confident at that the moment that “play guitar” will have a check next to it. My hope for you is that you do the same. Good luck with those new years resolutions but even more so good luck with all of your life experiences, because the moments, the experiences and the memories are what you should remember as we go through this crazy thing we call life.

The Give Up

It’s that moment just as you throw your arms up in the air and say “I give up”, that it happens. How many times have I heard that, how many times have I given that advice because I thought I believed it? I myself recently had done just that, thrown my arms up in the air. You know how people also say when you meet the one, you just know. There was a time I believed that but very recently I believed that was something that would happen to others, but I concluded it just wasn’t going to happen for me and I had accepted that.


Photo courtesy of Pinterest

What a foolish, foolish thing to accept. It was never to happen for me, that was my “I give up” moment. And just like that he appeared. I have recently met a man who has made me believe. Believe in it all. Never before did I actually think it was possible for someone to completely steal my heart in a matter of weeks, days, moments. I’m here to tell you if you’ve been searching and you’re ready to give up, it really truly can happen when you least expect it. For once I can tell you that not because I want to believe it but because I’ve experienced it.

He’s everything I had ever hoped for and more. Every heartbreak, lie, deceit, argument, tear shed, the why is this happening moment and more has made it all worth it in the end. Hang in there, it’s coming. I don’t know when and I don’t know how I only know that it’s coming. Keep the faith my friends, because when it happens it will be amazing.

A Letter to Best


Photo courtesy of Pinterest

It pains me and breaks my heart when I see people I love and care for hurting. I’m definitely the person who wishes I could pick up the broken pieces for you and put them back together, but I also realize that’s not possible. We have to be the ones who put ourselves back together. However, I believe it’s through the help of God, family and friends that we are able to ultimately have the strength to do that.

Right now I have some one in my life who is hurting like this right now and even though I know I can’t take the pain away I need them to know I’m here so this is a letter to Best…they know who they are.

Dear Best,

Let me start this letter off by saying I love you. Right now you are going through a pain I know too well. Your heart has been broken by someone you loved. There is nothing I can do or say that will take that horrific pain away, I know from experience. Each day gets a little better it seems and then something happens to set you back. You wonder will this ever go away? Deep down you know it will but that doesn’t change right now. What you do need is to know that there are people in your life who are there and to know you are NOT alone.

I will not lie, there will be nights you feel as though you are alone but it’s not true. If you can’t get a hold of someone to fill that feeling of void, turn to God, he will always listen. He has a plan and you can’t question it. You only can wait patiently for it. Everything happens for a reason and one day it will all make sense. One day something will happen or you’ll meet someone and realize this is what you’ve been waiting for…that moment.


Photo courtesy of Pinterest

No one knows exactly when it will happen they just know when it does. This is where I too must admit that I have had my doubts in that area and wonder when is it my time? But if the last few days indicate what I feel, then I’m a believer and I’m glad I never gave up the faith. It truly happens when you least expect it. 

Right now this time is about you, you healing and being the person you are. The person you always have been and should never change for anyone. It’s a time to be your Best.



Let this be a message to anyone in a similar situation. Life does get better, the pain will pass and when you least expect it, life becomes more wondrous than you thought possible.

To New Beginnings

While working out today someone made mention that there sure were a lot of people joining the gym…did they realize that New Year’s started over a month ago? And I thought, but why should they have to wait and start in eleven months to start on the new them today? Good for them for having the courage to start something some people will never have the courage to do once.

Maybe that’s the problem, we are always obsessed with our “New Year’s” Resolutions, that we think it’s only then we can make a change. But really in a year from now, no matter when you started, won’t you be glad you took that step to a better you when YOU¬†decided to. Perhaps it isn’t New Year’s Resolutions we should be striving for but for New Beginnings.¬†bd90ac0ea543c17642b53af92986437f

New Beginnings can start whenever you are ready…today, tomorrow, the next day, even a month from now or later, you choose. They begin when you are ready to undertake your next step in your life. Never let anyone discourage you by saying the time will have to wait.¬†This applies to all areas of life really…fitness, goals, dreams, even love. New Beginnings can happen at any time and at any place.

What are you waiting for? Whatever it is and whoever you are, believe, this is only the start. Here’s to you and your New Beginnings.

No Place Like Home

Another Christmas has come and gone in the blink of an eye. It amazes me how with each year time slips away quicker and quicker. When did that happen? Not only did Christmas swiftly pass, they’ve changed. Yes¬†granted I’ve gotten older and not everyone in the family can be here and above all yes¬†I realize that the feeling and eagerness¬†will never quite be like that of when I was¬†a child and still believed. As a child there was no other excitement¬†like that of waiting for Santa. I remember the feeling of something magical to take place overnight. Growing up the enthusiasm¬†would really¬†reach its peak on the way home from church when mom or dad, one of my aunts or uncles, or whoever I might be riding with at the time would exclaim ‘think I just saw a red light in the sky, better hurry home to bed, must have been Santa with Rudolph leading the way.’ In my mind we couldn’t get home fast enough. So many things to do before bed and a long sleepless night.

believe in the magic

The family; mom, dad, my three brothers and myself would FINALLY get home, change into pajamas sit around the Christmas tree with our hot chocolate or eggnog and settle in for dad to read “The Night Before Christmas”. A family tradition to this day even if not everyone can always be home together to celebrate. Dad would read the story and we would then lay out cookies, eggnog or milk and our letters to Santa and run off to bed with instructions not too peak or come out of our rooms until morning.

Not sure I ever slept on those nights, I remember wanting nothing more than to just fall asleep already and wake to find if¬†Santa had really come. ¬†Well at some point I must have fallen asleep because I’d awake and it was morning, sort of, it was usually about five in the morning and even though all of us kids were up we knew mom and dad couldn’t be woken quite yet. My brothers and I would gather in one of our bedrooms and wait, but not very patiently, until about six. One by one, in that hour, we’d all have to “use” the bathroom at some point, but we all knew it was to take a glimpse into the living room and look to see if our stockings were full because if they were, we knew, Santa had come. When done in the bathroom we’d run back into the room in a fit of giggles and excitement to¬†proclaim, ‘Santa has come he really has’! ¬†After little sleep and one loooonnngggg hour of waiting to finally go to the living room, my oldest brother would allow us to go and sit with the Christmas lights on around the tree in hopes to wake mom and dad up. How could they sleep? Santa had visited, he’d eaten all the cookies the drink was gone and OH MY GOODNESS he wrote us a letter, a real note from the good old Saint Nicholas himself. Looking at it now I don’t know how I didn’t burst from excitement.

Mom and dad would get up not long after and the agonizing wait for my father began. Every little excuse he could find to prolong the opening of stockings and gifts he did. He’d have to read the paper, make his coffee,¬†drink¬†the first glass to the last drop then tease us with the idea of making a big breakfast and eating before we did anything. Oh, my dad was


amused with himself and would laugh at our clear impatience with him, but it amused him none-the-less. An amusement that I can appreciate now, it was a way to make the magic last just a bit more and keep the family together that much longer.¬†When I was younger perhaps we didn’t always have the most but what we did have meant everything and I wouldn’t trade anything for those memories and at times I wish I could get that feeling of excitement back. Yes, things have changed and I know the truth now of Santa and fully realize that Christmas is a celebration of Jesus’ birth but I love this time of year just as much as I did back then, if not more now.

It’s a time of family gathering, sharing stories of the past and being together. The magic of Christmas remains even if it’s a little different. As I type this at my parents, my home I grew up in, I think how often I don’t get back here and wish it was more. It’s a place I know I can always return no matter what, no questions asked, it’s a place of love and a place of memories a plenty. As I look down at the ironic ruby-red slippers, given to me by mom, the thought is not lost on me…there is no place like home. IMG_51291

This is Me

Champagne was poured, party favors handed out, the excitement in the room was contagious, everyone shouting down 5-4-3-2— HAPPY NEW YEAR! ¬†It was officially 2014 and not surprisingly my date had not made it in time for that infamous New Year kiss as a matter of fact, he hadn’t made it all and I decided this year was going to be different. ¬†This year was going to be about me and change.

Change had been a bit of a theme in the last few months but with a New Year brought new opportunities, new enthusiasm and ultimately new hope. ¬†Never had really thought about New Year’s resolutions before but this year I was on a mission,¬†I had goals and I figured it was time to write them down before I got caught up in too much champagne and forgot exactly what 2014 was going to be for me.

2014 New Year’s Resolutions:

1. ¬†Volunteer more – ‘Treat people the way you want to be treated’ has always been my belief.¬†Being blessed with many wonderful things in my life, it was time to pass a little of that on to those way more deserving than me.

2. ¬†Start a blog – Ever since I was young I enjoyed writing and telling stories, this couldn’t be more perfect for me. ¬†Diaries, journals, letters, stories, papers for school, speeches…I loved it all. ¬†Anytime I could put my words down in hopes that someone, somewhere, some day might read or hear them, be touched by them, laugh at them or be inspired by them I wrote. ¬†Now here’s the perfect avenue for all FullSizeRender1 (3)of that, why wasn’t I jumping on this opportunity earlier?

3. Take more moments to look at your surroundings – Staring at the stars is one of my all time favorite things to do and I¬†had gotten away from it. ¬†I think we all get away from our favorite things now and again. ¬†Nature is surrounding us each and everyday, look beyond the surface and see the beauty it beholds, you’ll be amazed and life will be simple again even if it’s just for that moment.

4. BELIEVE – is what I tell myself everyday, no matter what challenges life throws at me, because there’s a reason for it and you’ll get through it if you just believe.

After a while the list got pretty long and I realized I hadn’t just created 2014 New Year’s Resolutions, I had created what some may call a bucket list, I like to call it life adventures that I want to experience. ¬†Some resolutions or adventures may¬†take a little longer than others, but I have my list to remind me of what I want to do for me.

As I headed back to the party to join my friends I was ready for what life was going to bring my way in 2014 and years to come and I was ready to do it in my new Red Sparkly Boots!