Crushing

Remember your first crush? I’m not talking about elementary cute little I like you, you like me lets hold hands crush, I’m talking about feeling something in the pit of your stomach flip up into your chest, while your heart skips a beat and you have to catch your breath type of crush. The butterflies type of crush.

I’ll never forget my first real crush. It was eighth grade year and somehow I had ended up in the high school study hall and as luck would have it, eight of the cutest Seniors that walked those hallways at that time were in it with me. Now keep in mind I went to a school where I graduated with a class of 38. It wasn’t a big school by any means, it was obviously small enough that a fluke, like me in high school study hall, wasn’t completely out of the ordinary. But still at that time to an eighth grade girl, it was a dream come true!

Anyway, I digress. Walking in to study hall that first day of school I knew my schedule was different than some of my friends because of the classes I was taking, so I was disappointed to learn none of them were going to be in study hall with me. That disappointment lasted about a nanosecond when I discovered my crush was in there.

According to the dictionary crush is defined as, ” a brief but intense infatuation for someone, especially someone unattainable or inappropriate.” also said to be called puppy love. I was in eighth grade and he was a Senior star athlete, most definitely unattainable but a crush none the less.

Remember how your crush made you feel? There was sometimes short of breath if they were around. Lack of speech happened or just stammering. Turning red easily. Your heart beating so swiftly you’re almost positive that it skipped a beat. Then there was that grin, who can forget that grin…that goofy one you got just thinking about your crush, the one you had if someone mentioned their name and the same one you had when they walked into a room, the same one you might have right now as you picture them in your mind just reading this.

First crushes, awwww, how innocent they really were, how innocent it can still be! Believe it or not as an adult you can still have a crush and it can still be one of the coolest feelings in the world. For a brief moment you believe again, you feel a sense of hope and it’s an euphoric high, that almost makes you feel like a teenager because there’s someone who makes you feel giddy again.

Recently I had that crush moment and the thoughts of my first came rushing back and for a little bit everything felt right. When you have a crush sometimes it doesn’t turn into anything other than that, a crush that just wasn’t attainable. Then there are other times where you find that you aren’t the only one crushing. Those are the times that someone finally makes the move and realizes that maybe there’s something more here and together you will have to find out.

Crushes can turn to like, then like to smitten and smitten can turn to love. Yet, know this, it doesn’t always work like that…however, you’ll never know unless you take the chance, you take the risk. Those are scary words and I know the clear thought is to think what if it doesn’t work? Then I ask you this, what if it turns into the greatest adventure of your life? Isn’t that worth it, to know that instead of saying “what if” you’ll always be able to know at least you tried and that my friends is really all we can do. Be careful with your heart, but don’t protect it so hard that you miss out on what could have been.

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Make It A Happy One

What makes you happy? What makes you smile? Do that more often.

Have you ever heard a song or watched a TV show or perhaps a movie and you heard a line that just resonates with you. It speaks to you. That happened to me yesterday and believe it or not it was during the animated movie “Rock Dog”. I took a couple of my good friend’s daughters to the movie and the line that has been in my head since I heard it was so simple but true…”This is your life, make it a happy one.”

Let me say that again…

“This is your life make it a happy one.”

I ask you again, what makes you happy? We are surrounded by negativity, hate, separation, deception, sadness and more it seems every where we look. It’s easy to forget our happiness, it’s easy to be brought down.

I’ve been accused of being a little too optimistic at times, but that’s me. I see the good in people, I believe in the best and I trust things will turn out alright. That is just who I am, so I go looking for the good, because finding the good helps to make me happy. There are many things that help to make me happy and I intend to start doing them a little more, because it is my life and why shouldn’t it be happy.

Do you like to sing? Sing louder.

Do you like to read? Make time to read more.

Do you like to exercise? Then keep on doing it and make the time to make it happen, maybe switch up your routine and try something new!

Do you love your friends? Then show them, make time for them. 

Does your faith make you happy? Then share the word.

Do you love your family? Be with them more, tell them you love them.

Whatever good thing makes you happy, do more of it.

“This is your life, make it a happy one”, because why not? 

Do what makes you happy because it is your life, but don’t hate on others who are doing what makes them happy. We are all different, we all have different interests and we are each unique in our own way. Embrace that and enjoy what makes you happy, because you know what, we ALL deserve to be happy, yes including you. 

Motivation I Found You

About a year and half ago I was running in a 5k when I felt a pain in my knee I had never felt before. At the time I was about 2 miles in so at least I was closer than not to the finish line but at that moment it really felt a long way. I powered through the pain walking letting it subside, some what, then pick up running and it would hurt worse. What seemed liked an eternity I finally crossed the finish line, and limped my way to the vehicle. When I got home and couldn’t even change out of my clothes without crying out in pain I was for sure I had torn something in my knee. But being a little stubborn I waited until Monday to go in to the walk-in Orthopedic and see what I’d have to do. Fearing the absolute worst I was surprised I had not torn a thing but I had flared up my IT Band in my knee. I was also told that it was something that could go away eventually, might come back one day or might continue to have some pain. Thankfully the pain went away but after that I was a little timid to jump back into running so I started slacking at it. 

Cardio had been something I’d been doing for years when all of a sudden I had the fear of the pain coming back holding me back. My strength training increased but my motivation to run had some what disappeared. 

Recently I told myself I really need to start training again for I want to do the Go Far Challenge again at the Fargo Marathon and run the 5k and the 10k. But for some reason I lacked the motivation I once had, that was until recently.

Last week I went into my gym, Anytime Fitness, and found myself getting one of their new heart rate monitors. Who knew such a little object could be the exact motivation I needed! First off I had a little fun with the staff at the 45th Street Anytime Fitness location figuring out my nickname…hey if you’re going to do it might as well have some fun so in the end it was decided and so you know, when you see “Big Pimpin Zee” up on the screen at the gym, that’s me! 

However, I digress, back to the point, so Thursday after I got it I went into the gym for the first time in a long time to just get on the treadmill. You see the treadmill and I have a long history of not always getting along so I’ll often use it for a bit then jump on the elliptical or AMT machine to finish my cardio but surprisingly not this time. 

I talked with the manager in the South Moorhead location who excitedly told me I’d be blown away with how much it will get me to push myself. You see the idea is you see where your heart rate is during your workout and try to reach the percentage of where the color on the TV screen in front of you is orange. My plan was run ten minutes and then move onto the next thing. Imagine my surprise when I looked up and realized I was already a half hour in! Even before my IT Band flared up I barely was on the treadmill. I had never been that excited about what I had done on the treadmill in my life. Not only that after my workout was completed an email was sent to give me a summary of my workout, how many calories I had burned and it gave me points. 


This new little heart rate monitor is a workout game changer for me and I don’t say that lightly at all. It has inspired me to get in three runs already since I got it last Wednesday and I’m already planning my next workout with it for tomorrow. 

Finding that inspiration, finding that motivation for anything in life is so important and sometimes it comes at just the right moment. The heart rate monitor for me could not have come at a more perfect moment. My gym always surprises me and continuously find ways that inspire me and keeps me going. They are my gym family and I love them for helping to always keep me going no matter what! 

If you feel you’re in a slump of any kind and in any aspect of your life, it might be time to ask those around you for that little push. You might find that sometimes it’s the little things, like the heart rate monitor, that will give you the drive once again to go after your goals. 

This is the year to believe, to believe anything can happen. Make it your year I know it’s my plan to make it mine, now go out there…make it happen and believe! I know “Big Pimpin Zee” believes 😉